Working with others
Ask for help that's easy to give
A simple exercise to get unstuck faster by making help quick to give
When you're stuck, tell someone what you're trying to do, what you've already tried, and the specific help you need.
- 5 minutes
- You and someone who can help
- Whenever you're stuck
- Quick
Why this can work
“Can you help me with something?” leaves the other person to rebuild your whole problem before they can say anything useful. Saying what you're aiming for and what you've tried lets them skip to the useful part, and shows you've done your share. Specific asks tend to get specific help, and faster.
Read moreHow to ask for help at work
You’ll come away with a short request that gets you the exact help you need.
- Say what you're trying to do.
The goal, not just the step you're stuck on.
- Say what you've tried.
Two or three things, briefly, and what happened. It saves them suggesting what you've already done, and shows you've put in the work.
- Name the specific help.
A pointer, a second pair of eyes, ten minutes, a name. Where you can, ask for advice rather than a fix; asking what they'd try next is easier to answer than asking them to solve it.
- Send it to someone well placed, then close the loop.
Pick the person most likely to know. Afterward, tell them what worked; people like knowing their help landed.
To: someone who can helpI'm trying to what you're trying to do, and I'm stuck on the specific problem.
So far I've tried what you've tried, and what happened.
Could you the specific help: a pointer, a quick look, ten minutes? Even what you'd try next would help.
Swap the highlighted parts for your thing. Works on Slack, in email, or said out loud.
Good times to repeat it: when you've been stuck longer than you'd likebefore you spend a second day on the same problemwhen you're new and don't know who knows
Making it work for you
Every workplace is different. Here’s what to think about before you start, and what might get in the way.
Things to think about
People often ask how to do the step they're stuck on when the real answer is a different path. Saying what you're ultimately after gives the helper room to spot that.
What might make this harder
Ask someone who might know who knows. Who's the best person to ask about this? is a quick, easy question for almost anyone.
Questions people ask
How do I ask for help at work without looking incompetent?
Say what you're trying to do, what you've already tried, and the specific help you need. Showing your effort tends to make an ask read as capable, not helpless.
When should I ask for help at work?
Earlier than feels comfortable, once you've made an honest attempt and aren't making progress. Asking early is usually better for everyone than asking after a lost day.
How do I ask a coworker for help?
Keep it short: your goal, what you've tried, and one specific thing they could do. Asking what they'd try next is often easier for them than asking them to solve it.
How do I ask for help when I'm new?
Use the same three lines, and don't wait long; new people are expected to ask. If you don't know who to ask, ask someone likely to know who does.
Why this works, and where it comes from
Most requests for help start with a question like can you help me with something? It's friendly, and it's hard to answer. Before they can help, the other person has to rebuild your whole problem from scratch. What are you trying to do, what went wrong, what have you tried, what exactly do you want from them? Each of those is another message, and each one makes helping feel like a bigger commitment.
Three short lines change that. Your goal tells them where you're headed, which often matters more than the step you're stuck on. What you've tried saves them from suggesting it, and shows you're not handing over a problem you haven't worked on. The specific ask tells them how big a yes you need, and small and clear tends to get a quick yes.
It helps to ask for advice rather than a fix. What would you try next? is an easy question for someone who knows the area. It lets them help in two minutes without taking the problem on, and people tend to be more generous with advice than with their time. Many will then offer more than you asked for.
Timing is the other half. People often wait too long, out of pride or a worry about bothering anyone, and a problem that would have taken someone five minutes on Monday becomes a lost week. A well-framed ask early is a small cost to them and a big saving for you. Close the loop afterward and tell them what worked. That's what makes them glad to help the next time.
Other simple things to consider
What to do next
More in Working with others
A few minutes that compound
Do it with Truest and it goes on your permanent record, in a Career Vault your employer doesn’t own.
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- On your recordWhen it's done, it goes on your record with your priorities and progress.
- It comes back if it slipsA missed one comes back around instead of disappearing.
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An exercise written by Truest, based on our experience. Last updated September 25, 2026. We sell a career membership; where that’s relevant above, we say so.