Reviews & performance
Say where you're behind, and ask for help
A short conversation to tell your manager where you're behind, before it becomes a surprise
Take stock of what's gone well and what's been hard, then tell your manager and ask for help with one of the hard parts.
- 20 minutes
- You and your manager
- When you feel behind
- Conversation
Why this can work
Falling behind is common; what turns it into a problem is usually the surprise. Telling your manager early, with an honest view of what's working and what isn't, turns a worry you're carrying alone into something you can both work on. Naming what kind of hard it is, a skill you're still building or something getting in the way, makes the help much more likely to fit.
Read moreHow to tell your manager you're behind on work
You’ll come away with a manager who knows where you stand, and help with the hardest part.
- Write what's gone well, and why.
Two or three things. For each, what made it work: a habit, a person, an approach. That's what you'll want to protect.
Tip: This part is easy to skip when you feel behind. Don't. It's half of what you'll say.
- Write what's been hard, and what kind of hard.
For each, ask: is this something I'm still learning to do, or is something getting in the way of doing it? The first calls for practice, a teacher, or time. The second calls for a decision: a priority dropped, a blocker removed, a deadline moved.
- Tell your manager, early.
A short note before your next 1:1 works well. It gives them time to think instead of react.
To: your managerI'd like to use part of our next 1:1 for an honest update on where I am.
Going well: one or two things, and why they worked. Where I'm behind: the work, and roughly how far.
The main reason is a skill I'm still building, or what's been getting in the way. The thing that would help most is your one ask.
Swap the highlighted parts for your thing. Works on Slack, in email, or said out loud. - Ask for help with one thing.
Not everything at once. The one that would unlock the most. It's fine to ask how they'd approach it.
You“If you were in my seat, where would you start?” - Agree what happens next.
A date to check back, what's moving, what's paused. A line in writing afterward keeps you both clear.
Good times to repeat it: as soon as you notice you're slippinga month or more before a reviewafter priorities shift under you
Making it work for you
Every workplace is different. Here’s what to think about before you start, and what might get in the way.
Things to think about
Sometimes you're behind because priorities shifted and nobody said so. Asking can reveal that the goal changed, not you.
What might make this harder
Lead with the facts and a proposal: what's late, by how much, and what you'd suggest. A clear picture lands better than an apology.
Questions people ask
How do I tell my manager I'm behind on work?
Early, and with the whole picture: what's gone well, where you're behind and roughly how far, the main reason, and one thing that would help. A short note before a 1:1 makes it easier for both of you.
Should I tell my boss I'm struggling with a task?
Usually, yes. Saying whether it's a skill you're still building or something blocking you helps them offer the right kind of help, and it's far better than a surprise later.
What should I do when I feel behind at work?
Look at what's gone well and why, and what's been hard and why. Then tell your manager early and ask for help with the one thing that would unlock the most.
Why this works, and where it comes from
Feeling behind is a common quiet worry at work, and a lonely one. People put their heads down, hope to catch up before anyone notices, and say nothing. Sometimes it works. Often the gap grows, and by the time it surfaces, it's a surprise.
The look back before the conversation is a personal version of the retrospective many teams run at the end of a project, pointed at your own last few months. The wins side keeps you honest in both directions: you haven't failed at everything, and knowing why something worked tells you what not to drop while you're scrambling. The hard side does the sorting. I don't know how to do this yet and I can't get to this are different problems, and they need different help.
From your manager's side, early news is a gift even when it's unwelcome. A month out, they can add help, move a date, or cut scope. The day before, they can only absorb the miss, and often explain it to someone else. Hearing it from you, with a clear picture and one ask, also tells them something good about how you handle trouble.
If the reason you're behind is something personal outside work, start there instead: a short heads-up about what's going on, with the work update to follow. Context first tends to change how everything after it is heard.
Other simple things to consider
What to do next
More in Reviews & performance
Never lose the proof of your work
Do it with Truest and it goes on your permanent record, in a Career Vault your employer doesn’t own.
See how Truest worksAlready a member? Log in- Lands in your closeoutFriday's closeout asks for progress, priorities, and proud moments; this is one.
- A living page in your VaultKeep it as one page you add to, next to your reviews and your files.
- A reminder beforePut it on your calendar and Truest reminds you before it starts.
Read this alongside your role page
Tell Truest what you’re dealing with
We read every one, and we write guides for the things that come up most. Leave your email if you’d like to hear when we do.
An exercise written by Truest, based on our experience. Last updated September 25, 2026. We sell a career membership; where that’s relevant above, we say so.