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Insight
A book on self-awareness as two skills: knowing yourself, and knowing how others see you
Why it’s worth your time
Insight is worth your time if you've done plenty of reflecting and still get surprised by how you come across. Tasha Eurich, an organizational psychologist, separates knowing yourself from knowing how others see you, and argues the second needs other people. She also covers how to ask them, and what to do with an answer you don't like.
Seeing how you come across
The book · About 7 hours of reading · Buy or borrow
How to get it
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- Read for the two kinds of self-awareness.
Watch for her split between internal self-awareness, knowing your values and what you want, and external, knowing how others see you; for the ways she says introspection and journaling can backfire; and for her advice on choosing whom to ask for feedback.
- Ask one loving critic two questions.
Pick someone who's on your side and will tell you the truth; Eurich calls them loving critics. Name one thing you're working on, ask what they noticed over the past month and what they'd suggest for the next, and reply only with thanks.
You“I'm working on how I run meetings. Over the last month, what have you noticed? And what would you try in my place over the next one?”
Good moments for this: when feedback keeps surprising youafter a step up into a bigger roleonce a month with the same person
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Making it work for you
Every workplace is different. Here’s what to think about before you start, and what might get in the way.
Things to think about
In her team's research they were unrelated, so someone sure of their values can still misread their effect on a room, and the reverse. It helps to know which side you lean on.
What might make this harder
Thank them and leave it for a week or two before deciding anything. Eurich suggests checking it with another person you trust before you act on it.
Questions people ask
What is Insight by Tasha Eurich about?
A 2017 book by organizational psychologist Tasha Eurich arguing that self-awareness has two parts, knowing yourself and knowing how others see you, that both can be developed, and that popular routes like introspection don't always help. It draws on her team's research and hundreds of other studies.
What is the difference between internal and external self-awareness?
Internal is knowing your own values, passions, aspirations and reactions; external is understanding how other people see you. Eurich found the two unrelated, so you can be strong in one and weak in the other.
How do I get honest feedback about myself?
Pick a few people who want you to do well and will be honest, ask about one specific thing, and listen without defending yourself. A short, regular check-in tends to work better than a one-off request.
What it says, and how it holds up
Self-awareness, in Tasha Eurich's account, is two different kinds of knowledge: what you value, want and tend to do, and how other people experience you. In her team's research the two were unrelated, so being strong at one says little about the other. She describes herself as stronger on the outside view, happier asking for feedback than sitting with who she is, and she gives names to the lopsided types.
The book covers seven things a self-aware person knows, from values and passions through to their impact on others, and the barriers in the way, including what she calls the cult of self. On the inside, she favors short, targeted habits over long ones: a daily check-in on what went well and what to do smarter tomorrow, and journaling around big events more than every day. On the outside, her tools range from a small circle of loving critics to a dinner where you ask someone what you do that annoys them most, an exercise she credits to a communications professor.
Eurich's TEDx talk, Increase your self-awareness with one simple fix, is a free way into one strand of the book. Research outside her team points the same way as her split: the psychologist Simine Vazire's work (2010) found that people tend to know their own anxiety better than their friends do, while friends often judge traits like intelligence more accurately than the person does. Some of her tools assume relationships sturdy enough to take honest answers. Not every team has those.
When you're already raw, after a layoff or a bruising review, asking for critique can add bruises. It may be wiser to start by asking what people see as your strengths.
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Picked by Truest and described in our own words. The original belongs to its creator. Last updated October 9, 2026. We sell a career membership; where that’s relevant above, we say so.